On Our Own Terms

In my last blog post, we touched on the dark past of Black Breastfeeding in the United States. One of the painful parts of our past has been wet nursing. However, Black Moms are taking back their power and seeking to craft a new portrayal of the act; one birthed from a place of love, respect, and consent.

Donor milk sharing is nothing new. Organizations like Human Milk Banking Association of North America (HBANA), Human Milk for Human Babies (HM4HB), and Eats on Feets offer donor milk options. HM4HB and Eats on Feets offer informal milk sharing, also known as peer to peer milk sharing, while HMBANA mainly services NICUs, hospitals, and milk banks around the country.

Certified Lactation Counselor (CLC) Jimeika Brown of Mamma’s Golden Milk Lactation Services saw a need and created a space. She created Breastmilk Donation for Black Mothers, a peer to peer milk sharing Facebook group. The groups “About” section notes that it is a group for “Women of Color, who would love to give and/or continue to give their children breastmilk.”, also noting that they understand that some women “may need help continuing their breastfeeding journey with the help of donor milk.” Jimeika shares a story of a Black Mother she met who asked for donor milk in a predominantly White breastfeeding group. The group was a buy/sell/trade group and the Black Mom simply couldn't afford to buy it and had nothing to trade. “I saw screenshots. It was so heartbreaking. The way that they were speaking to her was like she was the lowest of the low because she couldn't afford to buy the milk. And it bothered me SO much, especially as a Black Woman. Because here’s a Black Woman asking a White Woman for breast milk… I mean, it’s bad enough we have to get over that barrier and feelings and trauma that we hold with that, but to shame her…” After that, Jimeika knew what she had to do. She created the group and purchased a few breastfeeding related items as giveaways, to encourage a sense of community in the group. “To see all of us helping each other….. And I wanted it to be about MORE than donation. There were moms who thought they suffered from low supply as well...” With her training as a CLC, Jimeika was able to get moms the resources they needed. 

That was in June of 2017. Two years later, Jimeika’s group is a safe haven for more than 2,500 Black Moms. 

As a Donor Mom myself, I’ve donated to multiple parents of all races and ethnicities. I was even granted the extreme honor and privilege of donating my milk to my niece, appropriately named, Love. Stranger or not, it was always an act of love. As an Exclusively Pumping Mom, I understood the mental and emotional toll breastfeeding can take. Add that to concerns about your child's health or how you were going to feed them, I could sympathize and empathize with these moms, known and unknown. I reached out in Breastmilk Donation for Black Mothers Group and asked some of the other moms, donors and donees alike, what their experience with milk sharing was like. 

“My first daughter spent 22 days in the NICU and passed. I donated because… she wasn't there and this was the only way I could…. be closer I guess. I also saw a 2lb baby and several others thriving from breast milk and I know how important it is. I have nursed three other babies. Recently, a friend asked me to help her feed her baby. They were both frustrated and she just asked me to feed him. It made me feel empowered and connected. A house full of people and no one flinched. With my friend, I felt really good afterwards because I was able to help her in that moment. I’ve also received donor milk because I had to go out of town abruptly. Dad kept saying not to worry, but that stressed me even more. When I got that milk it was like I could breathe again.” - Tai, Rainbow Mom of 5

“My twin girls were delivered premature at 34 weeks and they spent about a month in the NICU. When I realized I had an oversupply, I knew in my heart I wanted other NICU babies to have the best start possible, just like my girls.” [If you’ve ever nursed another baby at the breast, what inspired you?] “I don’t know about inspiration. I didn’t even give it a second thought. She was hungry and wouldn't take a bottle. It was a family member’s baby. I just knew it was what I would want someone to do if it were my child.” - Rachel, Twin Mom

“We were in a department store; Mom was frustrated and the baby couldn't get a good latch. I offered to help and she left me. We went to a dressing room and as I began to show her, we both noticed her baby’s cries had triggered MY letdown. She asked me if it would be too weird to nurse her baby. I obliged. She said she felt better that her baby was actually able to nurse and that they just needed to work on it. I felt happy to help and proud that we both saw milk sharing as normal and ok.” - Milliche, 3 Time Breastfeeding #GirlMom

For Black breastfeeding mothers, it's important that the story of mothering, of breastfeeding, of womanhood doesn't end with what you read in a history book (or what you don’t). It’s important that the story is told by those living it. It is important that the experiences of Black Women not be marginalized and our traumas not simply paraded out for Black History or Black Breastfeeding Week soundbites. 

It is important that you believe Black Women. It is important that you trust Black Women.

But for Black Women, it’s MOST important that we believe, believe in, and trust OURSELVES. 

We are not subject to Black History. We ARE Black History.

February 6, 2020 11:39am: edited to update infographic on Four Pillars. Proper attribution to Eats on Feets noted.

Demystifying Breast Milk Storage

I think milk storage comes so naturally to me because as an Exclusively Pumping mom, I had to figure that out before I began breastfeeding. In the beginning, it was relatively easy because all my milk was going in my SonShine’s belly. But, as the weeks progressed, and I could bank an extra oz or 2 a day, milk storage became the bane of my breastfeeding existence. For moms who don’t or didn’t have that experience, milk storage begins as this dragon. So, how DO you navigate the beast that is storing your precious liquid gold so that you maximize space, cost, time, and don’t waste any?

**I want to preface this post by saying, some people never freeze a milliliter of breastmilk. You don’t need a freezer or deep freezer full of milk to be successful at breastfeeding. All you need is to define your OWN level of success, be that one day or one year.**

To demystify breast milk storage, we must first start with the basics. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, breastmilk can be stored 6-8 hours at room temperature (up to 77 degrees), 8 days in the refrigerator (39 degrees or colder), 6-9 months in a freezer (0 degrees or colder), and 12 months in a deep freezer (-4 degrees or colder). 

A lot of the confusion comes because this doesn’t tell you about transitions. Transitions could be from work fridge to home to home freezer. From the night stand to fridge and back out. Or from a freezer to a deep freezer and when these timelines begin.

Transitions

When transporting milk from work, school, or being away from baby, it is still good at room temperature for 6-8hrs. If utilizing a cooler bag with ice packs, the milk is still good inside that cooler pack with the ice pack for 24hrs. 

You don’t need to put it on ice to transport from work/school to home, as long as you refrigerate it within 6-8hrs (8hrs would be pushing it). When transitioning milk from the fridge to the freezer or deep freezer, the date it was expressed is the date that goes on the bag/container. And that date begins the “timer” for how long that milk is good for consumption.

If you have milk in a freezer and decide to move it to a deep freezer, the timeline is still based off that original date. For example, if I pumped a bag of milk on October 10, 2019 and placed it in the freezer on October 15, 2019, that milk is good in the freezer until July, 10, 2020 (9 months). If I decide on January 10, 2020 to move that milk to the deep freezer after it was in the freezer for 3 months, it’s now good until October 10, 2020). 

Labeling

When labeling milk that will be for the refrigerator and used within those 8 days, you can use a piece of tape and pen on the bottle or one of those liquid chalkboard pens (think Starbucks or a coffee shop). This can be milk used for daycare or when mom is away/running errands or a date night that’s coming up. You want to insure that you’re freezing milk before you hit that 8 day mark.

If/once you decide to transition your breastmilk to more long term storage (freezer/deep freezer), you want to ensure that your milk is labeled with the day it was pumped. Because that’s when its freshness timer starts.

Containers

People store in many different kinds of containers: bags, bottles, glass bottles, 1oz cubes. However you choose to store, ensure it works for your family and is something that's sustainable. I initially thought the storing in 1oz ice cubes and tossing in a freezer bag would work for my family, until I realized how much space they took up and that freezer bags are not sterile (breastmilk storage bags are sterile).

Volume

I think this is the biggest concern I see. “HOW MUCH MILK SHOULD I PUT IN THIS THING?” Most bags go up to 6oz. But, filling a bag to capacity and then freezing it takes the bag past its capacity. The milk storage bag can tear, and you won’t know until you go to defrost the milk. 

I always advise not to store in larger than 4-5 ounce increments. With the average breastfed baby taking a maximum of 4-5oz per feeding during their entire breastfeeding journey, a 4-5oz bang can be an entire feed or two. If there’s a leftover ounce or two from that bag, simply place in the refrigerator for the next feed. If you’re not going to use it any time soon, consider saving for external uses (milk baths, lotion, conditioner, etc).

Many moms have to store milk for some reason or another. Maybe they work or are a full time student. Maybe they stay at home and get the amazing opportunity to run to the Mom Spa… errr… I mean Target alone. Breastmilk storage doesn't have to be this big scary beast or anxiety inducing… thing! Hopefully, these tips help in taking one more thing off your plate!